Cougars, Whiskey and Blues

Me and Julia have the awful habit of getting ridiculously obliterated the night before important events. This time it was last Friday before we were set to shoot the 3rd episode of the Franz and Julia show. Of course the original plan was to get some drinks and discuss the layout of the episode but instead the night took on a life of it's own...

It all started with the usual Friday drinking party at work complete with awkward sexually charged speeches from our company CEO's and random appearances from reality t.v show hosts. I had to work late and Julia ended up hanging out with her film school friends Brian and Steve. Needless to say the promise of free booze courtesy of Julia led me to Brian's house (after stopping by Wendy's for a quick burger) where I found everyone wasted on the futon watching an uber soft core porno. After everyone was sufficiently disappointed and frustrated at the lame episode of Red Shoe Diaries we decided to pile into an empty bus that led us to "The Yale" which I had not been to yet.

The Yale is a single man's dream. Well. If you like loose 40+ year old women. After paying insane cover I fend off the hoards of cougars and make my way to the stage where Julia Steve and Brian are anxiously awaiting the house band "Brick House" which was apparently a huge thing for their class. As soon as I get there Julia informs me that she has a tab going. Yes. 2 double crown on the rocks and tequila shots later I am on the dance floor giving the wrong idea to a dozen over the hill ladies and avoiding the leftover ice from some guy's drink that Steve smashed on the ground. This went on for a while until we all ended up at the bar taking advantage of the all mighty tab along with the aboriginal wedding party that apparently decided that shady bars with hookers asking for money outside is a good venue for a reception. The lights turned on, the band stopped playing and it was time to step out into friday Granville Street gloriousness. 

Steve got his picture taken with two drunk skanky chicks, we lost Brian at a pizza place and made our way to Denny's. Julia had never been to Denny's. I know you are foreign but come on. We got there and ordered breakfast. Me and Steve decided to have shakes after Julia commented on how bad an idea this was. Brian showed up and it was a merry old time. Before Diana came over to serve us. Diana is this horrible waitress from hell at Denny's who came straight out of the trailer park in northern alberta and brought her mullet with her. After yelling at us not to bother her when she was carrying food and when I asked why my chocolate shake was more expensive than Steve's oreo shake (seriously) we left. Brian was already gone because he had 2 pieces of Pizza beforehand and decided to order the lumberjack breakfast so we figure he might still be puking over Granville Street bridge.

We got home at 5 in the morning and went to bed. The milk shake was a horrible idea. 10 minutes later it was in the toilet. I'll spare you the messy details. And the 20 minute cleanup. 

The next day me and Julia decided to re arrange heavy furniture in our living room. Then failed at the Franz and Julia Show. Thankfully I didn't end up with someone's mom in my bed.